During Christmas of 1986, I found myself in Venezuela, a country of stark contrasts that taught me an unexpected lesson about the nature of happiness and joy. The Spanish language itself offered the first insight through its two forms of the verb "to be": "estar" for temporary states and "ser" for permanent ones. Intriguingly, in Spanish, happiness ("felicidad") always pairs with "estar" – the temporary form – while joy ("gozo") pairs with "ser" – the permanent form.

This linguistic distinction came alive for me through an encounter with a young Venezuelan boy who received a simple plastic truck for Christmas. From my privileged 20-year-old perspective, I initially judged it as inferior to the elaborate gifts of my childhood. Yet this child treasured it, playing with it day after day well into the new year. His pure delight with this modest toy challenged my shallow understanding of happiness.

Recently, reading Arthur Brooks' piece in The Atlantic about happiness made me reflect on this memory and its deeper meaning. While our society increasingly struggles with unhappiness – particularly among those who seemingly "have it all" – I'm reminded of that boy with his truck, finding genuine joy in life's simple gifts.

This contrast feels particularly relevant during the holiday season. Our modern Christmas traditions often emphasize material gift-giving over deeper connections. As Ralph Waldo Emerson wisely noted, "Rings and jewels are not gifts, but apologies for gifts. The only true gift is a portion of thyself."

The distinction between happiness and joy isn't merely semantic – it's transformative. While happiness often depends on external circumstances, joy emerges from within, from our approach to life and our connections with others. This Christmas season invites us to look beyond the temporary pleasures of happiness and seek the lasting contentment of joy.

Perhaps the path to greater joy begins with shifting our focus from what we receive to what we give of ourselves. It means finding delight in simple moments, nurturing genuine connections, and embracing the permanent over the temporary. As we enter this holiday season, let's challenge ourselves to seek joy that transcends circumstance – the kind of joy that, like that young boy's delight, springs from a deeper well than mere happiness.

What moments of true joy will you create this holiday season?